Sunny Sunday Morning

Good Morning!
Interesting morning.... REALLY tired, big cramps and a .6 pound weight loss put a big old smile on my face. Everything is relative. :-)

Work is insane and I have a headache.... but its still all good. Because my shorts need a belt and I gotta smile... LOVE IT!

I am really pumped about this. It is moments like this that I realize how tired I am of being overweight. It is strange... yesterday I was frustrated because when I diet I feel like I am deprived. Not of food.... in general, because I am not eating all my food each day... but deprived certain foods. Like all this candy Lynette has brought in. It is so hard to not want to eat and eat it with everyone. I did try the fudge, and it isnt the greatest... but I would LOVE to eat a piece or 2 and the pretzels look and sound yum and the chocolates and the caramel walnuts (which I had one of...) are YUM! And I feel deprived.... like it isnt fair that I cannot eat them too. But today... today I am doing ok.... showing Jared all the new treats and wishing I could try them all... but truly ok. Because my shorts want to fall off of me. NICE!

I guess I have always dreamed of being skinny, of wanting to wear the cute clothes and well, feeling cute. I DO feel much prettier today than I ever have... I have a special person to thank for that, one who believes in me and sees the beauty in me even when I am blind to it. (Every girl should have someone in their life who makes them feel like this!) And I am starting to believe it more and more myself... that I can do this. And I can be skinny, and dress pretty and feminine. I cannot wait! I find myself actually looking at the clothes in my closet and wanting something NOT so plain or boyish or bleah. I want to do my hair and wear a pretty top and watch Prince Charming (and any other boy who notices) to turn and look... I know it sounds so vain... but, well I am tired of people looking and making comments because I am fat. I just want it because I look good. I dont think that is too much to want. grin.

Work is still crazy, I am not hungry, my headache is still here,.... maybe a little better... but my shorts are still too big and my smile is still here and I am about 12 pounds down... AND I LOVE IT!